Types

sTarzan
Me, Tarzan you hopefully do not think punctuation is sexy.

My next few posts will be about the categories the men on match fall into. I have noticed many trends. The names have been changed to protect the innocent, but I wish you could know how very little I have changed around these postings. I will start with my personal favorite, the Tarzan men. The Tarzan man has no use for spelling, punctuation, or complete sentences. His profiles go something like this: “im steve looking for good women. Maybe meet in prson os can see if good match. Like tv sex listen music.
Or
Me a man look fro woman want someone not afraid of kinky. Send me line babe.

http://failblog.org/2009/11/02/tarzan-fail/

My other favorite is the pretentious stream of consciousness man. It’s like Nietzsche and James Joyce came together and spewing bull shirt all over my screen. His writing goes something like this:

“Sunrise, nighttime. Sex, coffee. I am man, you are woman. I am looking for a real woman to face the ridiculous joy of being an existial human being at every sunrise. Color-black and white. I have traveled all over the world, from culture to culture dying every day as I live. You. Me. Pot roast. Guinea pigs. Cultural world music. Cool but warm. Vacillate.Servant, master. Sex. Let me say it again, sex. Without sex, a relationship is just a friendship. And then why bother? I feel the earth under my feet. I long to kiss the tips of a woman’s fingers as we caress the stars. All religions are evil, it is the spiritual wonderment of it all that every being should worship inside themselves. You, looking for me. I seeking the truth. Maybe we will be a match. Who knows, but what will we lose in the end? Only nothing.

Buttercups.


Btw, do not bother to approach me of you are pretentious or fake. I hate all pretentious people. You can just die in a ditch for all I care. Don’t bother. “
Who needs acid when one can just read their profiles. And I swear to God that pretentious stream of Consciousness man ALWAYS says something about hating fakeness and/or pretention.